What's Up With Sesshouaru?
by KhalyadaRie
Summary: I thought it might be fun to do a funny ‘study Sesshoumaru’ fanfic.He’s pretty smart so we’ll have to get sneaky. Be sure to sit back a bit, I don’t want Sesshoumaru to know any one’s there. I can’t be held responsible for any of his actions
1. What's up with Sesshoumaru?

What's up with Sesshoumaru?  
By  
Cherie Duarte  
"I don't own what doesn't belong to me"  
Hi! Some times I become very obsessed with certain anime characters, and  
when I do, strange things start to happen. Anyway, I thought it might be  
fun to do a funny 'study Sesshoumaru' fanfic. He's pretty smart so we'll  
have to get sneaky. Be sure to sit back a bit, I don't want Sesshoumaru to  
know any one's there. I can't be held responsible for any of his actions if  
he finds out you're there. This is going to be pretty random and kind'a  
strange. I hope you all like it. So here goes, do enjoy!  
"talk" = talking  
(Mom) = who's talking  
'think' = thought  
* blink * = action  
"Just have to put on this invisible outfit so Sesshoumaru won't be able to  
tell that I'm there." (Cherie) I throw on the outfit over my clothes and  
walk out of my room.  
"Now where is that video camera?" (Cherie) I stop to think for a moment and  
then walk around the wall and go into the kitchen.  
"AH-HA! There it is!" (Cherie) I run over to the counter – its not that  
far, but I run around my house all the time- and pick up the video camera.  
"I wonder who left it here? Oh well, I have what I need... I think..." (Cherie)  
I turn around and walk over to another counter. Bending down I open the  
cabinet and pull out a few bags of various snack items and a teenie. I  
shove them in my invisible outfit's pockets and go back over to the fridge.  
"Let's get this done." (Cherie) I open the fridge, pull on a pack of  
Twinkies and a portal opens up. I hop in and land some where in Feudal  
Japan.  
"That was fun..." (Cherie) I get up and start walking around. I come to a  
creepy forest and enter it slowly.  
"I'm glad I'm invisible, both to sight and any other senses..." (Cherie)  
After watching some demons tear each other to pieces I continue on. I stop  
by a river and turn the camera on. It makes a funny buzzing noise.  
"Shh... you stupid camera!" (Cherie) I whack the camera and look around,  
hoping no one heard it. I pick it up and look through it.  
"Ok, he should be arriving soon... Sesshoumaru a.k.a. Fluffy, comes here a  
lot." (Cherie) A few minutes go by.  
"Well in case you're wondering, yes, I stalk Fluffy. Oooo! There he is!"  
(Cherie) I point the camera at Sesshoumaru.  
"We're here today to study Fluffy in his natural habitat with some  
unnatural behavior."(Cherie) Sesshoumaru is walking by the river and stops  
near a big rock.  
"This should get good. This is his favorite spot." (Cherie) Sesshoumaru  
disappears behind the rock and comes back out wearing a superman outfit. He  
starts running around the rock in circles with his arms out in front of  
him.  
"Duh-duh-duh! Dunna-nanana! Is it a bird? Is it a sword? NO! It's the  
almighty Sesshoumaru!!" (Fluffy)  
"Where does he learn these things? Do you think giving him a T.V. was a bad  
idea? Anyway, this is "Fluffy" on one of his more normal days. Let's see  
what he does next." (Cherie)  
Sesshoumaru stops and jumps on top of the rock. He jumps off sideways.  
"FREE WILLY!" (Fluffy) He falls into the water and stays under for a while.  
"Uh-oh..." (Cherie)I stand back a bit to get a wider view.  
"Looks like an unsuspecting demon has wondered into Fluffy's territory.  
This could get ugly guys..." (Cherie) The demon walks over to the river,  
probably wondering what all the noise was about.  
Sesshoumaru comes up half way out of the water and slashes the other demon  
to pieces.  
"Looks like Fluffy is very protective of his territory, or he just doesn't  
want every one to know about his habits. He seems to have several odd  
rituals. I wonder why he only came half way out – Hey! Where's his  
shirt!?!* drool*" (Cherie) Sesshoumaru slides out of the water with a  
mermaid tail in place of his legs. I fall back laughing and end up  
recording some leaves swaying in the light breeze. I sit back up and  
continue recording Fluffy after my laugh attack ends.  
"La, la , la, la, la, la, LLLLAAAAAAAAA!" (Fluffy) The sound is ear-  
piercing and scares a whole bunch of birds away.  
"Ahhhhh! Cover your ears! It's horrible. It's got to be the strangest  
mating call I've ever heard." (Cherie) After a good three minutes he stops  
"singing" and goes back into the water.  
"Ok, I hope we don't go through that again. Have no idea what he's going  
to do next... hopefully it doesn't sound as bad as that." (Cherie)  
"Dun-nuh... duh-nuh ... dun-nuh- du -nuh- dun-nuh- dun-nuh." (Fluffy) He swims  
around with his hands making a triangle over his head. Now he's wearing  
shorts.  
"Does he have a closet under there? In the water that is... Ah! Look at those  
legs – no wonder he wears those puffy clothes. They're so skinny!" (Cherie)  
Sesshoumaru jumps up out of the water and walks over to a tree. He looks  
around; making sure no one is looking and sticks his hand in a hole in the  
tree.  
"Hm... Is he going to turn into an owl? Oooo... he's being sneaky lets get a  
closer view." (Cherie) I walk around the outskirt of the trees – careful  
not to step on anything noisy – and zoom the camera in on Sesshoumaru.  
Sesshoumaru pulls out a blue box and places it on the ground. He sits down  
next to it and opens the lid.  
"What's he keep in there? Dog treats?" (Cherie) Sesshoumaru pulls a stuffed  
animal puppy.  
"Oooo... He has a stuffed animal. A foot long, black and white spotted  
puppy." (Cherie)  
"Oh my puppy!" (Fluffy) He hugs the stuffed animal and then unravels a  
string from around its neck. He stands up and starts running around with  
it.  
"Come on Peggy-poo! Follow daddy!" (Fluffy)  
"Peggy-poo? Daddy? *hysterical laughter * ....I am sorry... It's just funny..."  
(Cherie)  
Sesshoumaru continues to fun with the stuffed puppy. When it hits into a  
rock he stops and picks it up.  
"Aw... poor Peggy-poo. Are you ok?" (Fluffy) He hugs the puppy stuffy and  
puts it down.  
"Maybe that's why Inuyasha calls Sesshoumaru "Fluffy"? I wonder if Inuyasha  
knows about this..." (Cherie)  
That's all for today my friends. May the sky turn pink and rain green  
beans for forty minutes and chickens migrate over sea! Bye! Please review,  
even if you just say 'I read it' – I don't mind – anything to let me know  
some one is reading this crazy stuff! I really must go, I have to close my  
mine for now – too much traffic, and I can't think. 


	2. He has a WHAT?

What's Up with Sesshoumaru?

Chapter 2: He has a WHAT?

Hi people out there! How are you all? Hopefully you've had enough time to recuperate from the injuries you got from laughing too hard at chapter one. This chapter's going to be another head-banging-laugh-'til-you-cry chapter. Oh – yeah, I don't own what doesn't belong to me… though I wish I owned Sesshoumaru… he's so… sexy.

"talk" = talking

(Mom) = who's talking

'think' = thought

blink = action

"What's he doing now?" (Cherie) I follow Sesshoumaru with the camera as he walks back to the box. He says something too quietly for the camera to pick up and stuffs the stuffed-dog into the box. He sits on the ground and pulls something out of the box.

"Oooo… what do we have here? gasp Is that a – a – Barbie Doll?!? Oh my God it is!! Fluffy's got a Barbie Doll! laugh I wonder where he got that from…." (Cherie) We watch as Fluffy takes the doll and a small bag over to a rock near the water. He starts playing with the doll.

"Hi Barbie…" (Fluffy)

"He's… he's gonna… laugh, cough, choke, laugh some more"(Cherie)

"Hi Seshoumaru…"(Fluffy) He poses the doll standing, with one hand up to wave hi.

"This is crazy laugh he's really playing with a Barbie doll… laugh." (Cherie)  
" signing voiceYou wanna go for a ride?" (Fluffy) He looks seductively at the doll.  
" hysterical laughter If only… laugh Inu Yasha…. laugh knew about…. This…" (Cherie)  
"Sure Sesshoumaru…." (Fluffy) He makes the doll walk over to him.

"Babe, you can call me Fluffy." (Fluffy) He picks up the doll.

"Ok… _Fluffy_." (Fluffy) He wiggles the doll and the puts it down.   
"This is just too… much! Oh I can't wait to show every one this tape!!! Let's observe our 'Fluffy' on his imaginary date with his 'Barbie'." (Cherie) Sesshoumaru starts to sing and makes the doll dance.  
"I'm a Barbie girl, in a Barbie world …Life in plastic, it's fantastic." (Fluffy) He gets up and starts dancing.  
"… You can brush my hair Fluffy runs his hands through his hair and the grabs a brush and brushes Barbie's hair, undress me everywhere…." (Fluffy) He takes the doll's clothes off and puts different clothes on it.  
"Oooooo! He's crazy I tell you! CRAZY!" (Cherie) I go back to laughing hysterically.   
"Imagination, that is your creation…." (Fluffy) He holds up the doll in her new outfit – a green and white bikini.  
"Hey, I know where to send my little sisters when they want to play Barbie Dolls…" (Cherie)  
"Come on Barbie, let's go party! Ah-ah-ah-yeah!" (Fluffy) He starts dancing while he sings.

"Amazing he knows how to sing now…. laugh I've never seen a demon act this way… it's soo…. Strange… I wonder what his father would think of him now?" (Cherie)  
"I'm a Barbie girl, in a Barbie world ….Life in plastic, it's fantastic." (Fluffy) He throws down the doll and dances some more.

"Uh-oh, a sense another act of craziness coming on. What could he be thinking?" (Cherie)   
"You can brush my hair, undress me everywhere. Fluffy starts stripping Imagination, that is your creation." (Fluffy)

"OH MY GOD!!!!!! HE'S SO HOT!!!" (Cherie)  
"I'm a blond little girl, in a fantasy world, Dress me up, make it tight, I'm your dolly." (Fluffy) He starts dancing on the rock like a stripper.   
"….. drool…." (Cherie)  
" dances like a guyYou're my doll, rock'n'roll, feel the glamouring thing, kiss me here blows a kiss, dances like a girl, touch me there, hanky panky. You can touch, you can play, if you say: "I'm always yours"" (Fluffy)  
"Um…. Wow… still trying to recover from site and laughter" (Cherie)   
"uu-oooh…." (Fluffy)   
"Uh-oh is right… man this would be the best black mail tape ever… To think… I could get Fluffy to do what ever I wanted him to… dreams" (Cherie)  
"Come on Barbie, let's go party!" (Fluffy) He keeps dancing, switching between Barbie and Ken's roll.   
"Ooo.. must resist ties ankles to low tree branch …must resist jumping out…. Must stay here…." (Cherie)  
"Make me walk, make me talk, do whatever you please," (Fluffy)  
" regains strength to resist Oh, you will be doing what ever I please… Unless you want me to show this to every one….evil laugh not like I'm going to show it to just one person… I'm show'n it to any one who wants to see!!!" (Cherie)  
"I can act like a star starts acting it out, I can beg on my knees. Come jump in, be my friend, let us do it again, hit the town, fool around, let's go party You can touch, you can play, if you say: "I'm always yours"…" (Fluffy)

"Oh man… they're gonna love this!! Now they'll see the 'true' Fluffy." (Cherie)   
"Come on Barbie, let's go party! I'm a barbie girl, in a barbie world. Life in plastic, it's fantastic. You can brush my hair, undress me everywhere. Imagination, that is your creation." (Fluffy)

"Oh.. I'm very creative… this is going to go a long, long way…." (Cherie)  
"Oh, I'm having so much fun! Well Barbie, we're just getting started. Oh, I love you Fluffy…." (Fluffy) He picks up the doll and the plastic bag and walks back over to the box.

"What? No bow? No encore? Men… Oh well I loved every minute of it… Hope you all enjoy this one… Wait there's more…" (Cherie) Camera follows Sesshoumaru over to the box. I untie my ankles while laughing quietly, well as quietly as it is possible when you just saw what I saw. Sesshoumaru stuffs the doll and the bag in the box and pulls out a magenta blankey and something small dangling on a string.

"Hm... what is our subject up to now?" (Cherie) The camera shows Sesshoumaru walking over by the river. He sits down and unfolds the blanket. He puts it down with the stringed object.

"One minute… I'll be right back…" (Fluffy) He gets up and walks into the woods, really deep.

"Hmm… lets go see what he's got here…" (Cherie) I walk out slowly at first, then I run a little bit.

"Ah-ha! picks up a binky So that's what it was! I can't believe he has a _binky_! A pink binky!!" (Cherie)

"And what's this for? picks up blanket Isn't is a little… girly?" (Cherie)

" Oh, what's that? picks at a spot on the blanket that looks like a little sticker of a flower….peels sticker off and rips blanket Ooops! Hehehe… he won't notice." (Cherie) I put it back down and run back to my hiding spot. Sesshoumaru comes back and notices his blanket.

" sniffle Waaaa… my blankey has a hole in it!! sniffle..." (Fluffy)

"_Blankey?_ Did I hear him correctly? You heard that right?" (Cherie)

"Who could have done such a horrible thing!?! And to my BLANKEY!!!! Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah! sniffle, picks up binky and puts it in his mouth Why? sniffle Why!?!" (Fluffy) He hugs the blanket, sits down and rocks back and forth crying.

"He actually uses it!?!" (Cherie) I laugh so hard I drop the camera, luckily you can still see Sesshoumaru as he falls asleep – rocking, crying, hugging the blanket – all with a binky in his mouth. I pick up the camera.

"And… laugh this… laugh… oooowww…. laugh this is… laugh a day in… laugh Sesshoumaru…laugh a.k.a. Fluffy's… life…" (Cherie) You hear hysterical laughter and the tape goes blank.

DA-DUM! What'd you think? Funny or what? Man that took a while; sorry for not updating sooner, but school can be a pain in the butt. Anyway, thanks for the reviews! It's great to know the world is alive out there! Ok, next chapter should be close to as funny as this as we will find out what happens later on in the night, when a blanket thief comes about.

So until then – good day! May the sun shine like apples in a desert and the moon be crispy cheese!


	3. Blanket Thief

What's up with Sesshoumaru?

Chapter 3: Blanket Thief

By

Cherie Duarte

A/N: WAAAAAAAAAAAAA! I don't own Sesshoumaru! Waaaaaaaa!

OK, all done crying now. Thank you every one for the reviews! I _love_ reviews. It makes me sooooo happy! Now you get an other funny chapter! Do enjoy the random pokes of insanity on Sesshoumaru…

' thought' thinking

Sitting up fast, I realize I fell asleep after all that laughing.

" Man, that was just too funny… ooo! What's happening now?" (Cherie) I look over some bushes and see Sesshoumaru sleeping.

"Oh well, nothing interesting…. Might as well get something to eat." (Cherie) I dig my hands through my pocket and pull out a can of cherry Pepsi and a Twinkie.

" Mmmm…. Yummy." (Cherie) I drink some soda and eat the Twinkie. I grab the camera and stuff it in my pocket. I get up and walk over to Sesshoumaru.

"Aw… so cute." (Cherie) I pull out the camera, turn it on and walk around Sesshoumaru. Then I put it away.

" Pssss…. Hey…. psss…." (Cherie) I poke Sesshoumaru. He jumps up ready to attack and I laugh.

"HA HA! I scared you!" (Cherie) Sesshoumaru looks at me funny.

"What are you doing here?" (Fluffy) He sits down and yawns.

" Nothin' much, I just got bored at home…" (Cherie) I put my hands in my pockets. I pull out a pudding cup from one pocket and a spoon from the other.

"What's that?" (Fluffy) Ha makes a face as he points to the pudding.

"Pudding." (Cherie) I open it and eat some with the spoon.

"Can I have some?" (Fluffy)

"I thought you didn't eat "human" food?" (Cherie) I smile.

"There's a lot I do that I say I don't." (Fluffy)

"So you're a hypocrite?" (Cherie)

"No, I just don't like telling people about… some of it. I have a reputation to keep." (Fluffy)

"Oh." (Cherie) 'Well you just blew it.' I hand him the pudding cup and the spoon. He drops the spoon and uses his fingers.

"Uh… the spoon did have a purpose…." (Cherie) Sesshoumaru eats all the pudding.

"What else do you have in your pockets?"(Fluffy)

"Um… lots of stuff… Why?" (Cherie)

"Just wanted to know…. "(Fluffy)

"Oh, well, ok….I have something for you."(Cherie) I stick my hands in my pocket again.

"What could you possibly have for me this time? Is it another copy of a Brittney Spears CD?" (Fluffy) I look at him and struggle to hold back my hysterical laughter.

"What?"(Fluffy)

"Nothing, here, you might like this…" (Cherie) I pull out a CD (amazingly I can fit all these things in my pockets...) and hand it to him. He looks at it fast then back at me.

"What's on it?"(Fluffy)

"Um…a few songs you might enjoy…" (Cherie) I shrug; trying to look like it's no big deal, although I know all too well what's on the CD.

"Can I borrow your… um… what do you call it?" (Fluffy)

"Radio? Yeah, sure…" (Cherie) I dig my hands into my pockets and, with much difficulty; I pull out a mini radio with a CD player (Not a walkman, but an actual radio). Sesshoumaru takes it and puts the CD in.

"Bye. Go away now human girl…" (Fluffy) I smirk and walk away.

"See ya' dog." (Cherie) I walk off and pretend to leave. Of course I hide behind some nice bushes, sit down and wait for the fun to begin.

Muhahahahhahaha I leave u wit this, as I have to do some musical research for the next part!

Pls review!

P.S. sorry about the forever no update, started college and work and had no time for anything! I will try to get more updates as soon as I can find time in my life. I do miss every one!


	4. Coconuts and What Nots

What's Up with Sesshoumaru

By Cherie Duarte  
Chapter 4: Coconuts and what nots

A/N: I don't own what isn't mind.

* * *

I set up my camera on a mini tripod, adjust the lens and sit back for the best show ever.

"Get ready for some fun," (Cherie) laughs

Sesshoumaru opens the CD player and puts the CD in. The music starts to play:

"Down at the county fair  
One evening I was there  
I heard a barker shouting  
Underneath the flair..." Fluffy looks at it funny, smiles an evil looking smile and starts singing along.

"Oh, I've got a lovely bunch of coconuts."

"Dee-dul-lee-dee" (fluffly)  
"There they are all standing in a row." Fluffy gets up and marches around.  
"Big ones, small ones, some as big as your head." Fluffy jumps up on a rock and sreams -

"DEE DUL LEE DEEE!"(fluffy)  
"Give 'em a twist, a flick of the wrist." Fluffy shakes his groove thing.  
"That's what the showman said.

"Oi! I've got a lovely bunch of coconuts." Fluffy dances all around the open field.  
"Every ball you throw will make me rich.  
There stands me wife,  
The idol of me life,  
Singing roll a bowl, a ball, a penny a pitch." Fluffy rolls around on the ground. He stands up and sings at the top of his lungs.

"Singing, roll a bowl a ball a penny a pitch.  
Roll a bowl a ball a penny a pitch.  
Roll a bowl a ball.  
Roll a bowl a ball.  
Singing, roll a bowl a ball a penny a pitch!" (Fluffy)Fluffy stops and looks at the radio as it stops for a moment.

Im laughing so hard i can barely breath

The next song begins:

I LIKE TO MOVE IT  
MOVE IT  
I LIKE TO MOVE IT  
MOVE IT  
I LIKE TO MOVE IT  
MOVE IT  
YA LIKE TO (MOVE IT)

Fluffy starts dancing like a lunatic all over the place, showing how he likes to "move it".

in the bushes, I'm laughing so hard I can barely breath!

"ALL GIRLS ALL OVER THE WORLD  
ORIGINAL MAD STUNTMAN PON YA CASE MAN!  
I LOVE HOW ALL THE GIRLS A MOVE THEIR BODY  
AND WHEN YA MOVE YA BODY" (Fluffy) He starts movie like a crazy belly dancer!

"UNO MOVE IT  
NICE AND SWEET AND SEXY ALLRIGHT!  
WOMAN YA CUTE AND YOU DON'T NEED NO MAKE-UP  
ORIGINAL CUTE BODY YOU A MEK MAN MUD UP  
WOMAN YA CUTE AND YOU DON'T NEED NO MAKE-UP  
ORIGINAL CUTE BODY YOU A MEK MAN MUD UP" (fluffy) he shakes his hands and starts dancing in a circle.

"WOMAN! PHISICALLY FIT"(fluffy) he traces out a "figure" and dances around all womanly.  
"PHISICALLY FIT  
PHISICALLY  
PHISICALLY  
PHISICALLY  
WOMAN! PHISICALLY FIT  
PHISICALLY FIT  
PHISICALLY  
PHISICALLY  
PHISICALLY"(fluffy) he jumps up onto a rock in the water and dances.

"WOMAN! YA NICE  
SWEET FANTASTIC  
BIG SHIP PON DE OCEAN THAT A BIG TITANIC  
WOMAN! YA NICE SWEET ENERGETIC  
BIG SHIP PON DE OCEAN THAT A BIG TITANIC  
WOMAN! YA NICE  
SWEET FANTASTIC  
BIG SHIP PON DE OCEAN THAT A BIG TITANIC  
WOMAN! YA NICE  
SWEET FANTASTIC  
BIG SHIP PON DE OCEAN THAT A BIG TITANIC  
WOMAN!" he jumps into the water and makes a big splash.

(fluffy) he screams,  
"I LIKE TO MOVE IT  
MOVE IT  
I LIKE TO MOVE IT  
MOVE IT  
I LIKE TO MOVE IT  
MOVE IT  
YA LIKE TO (MOVE IT)" he starts bobbing around in the water.

"WOMAN YA CUTE AND YOU DON'T NEED NO MAKE-UP  
ORIGINAL CUTE BODY YOU A MEK MAN MUD UP  
WOMAN YA CUTE AND YOU DON'T NEED NO MAKE-UP  
ORIGINAL CUTE BODY YOU A MEK MAN MUD UP  
EYELINER - PON YA FACE  
A MEK MAN MUD UP  
NOSE POWDER - PON YA FACE  
A MEK MAN MUD UP  
PLUCK YA EYEBROW  
PON YA FACE A MEK MAN MUD UP  
GAL YA LIPSTICK  
PON YA FACE A MEK MAN MUD UP  
WOMAN YA NICE BROAD FACE  
AND YA NICE HIP MAKE MAN  
FLIP AND BUST THEM LIP  
WOMAN YA NICE AND INERGETIC  
BIG SHIP PON DE OCEAN THAT A BIG TITANIC  
WOMAN! YA NICE  
BROAD FACE  
AND YA NICE HIP  
MAEK MAN FLIP AND BUST THEM LIP  
WOMAN YA NICE AND INERGETIC  
BIG SHIP PON DE OCEAN  
THAT A BIG TITANIC - WOMAN!" He gets up back onto the rock and starts dancing like a raving lunatic.

"I LIKE TO MOVE IT  
MOVE IT  
I LIKE TO MOVE IT  
MOVE IT  
I LIKE TO MOVE IT  
MOVE IT  
YA LIKE TO (MOVE IT)" (fluff)

"I LIKE TO MOVE IT, Yeah, I LIKE TO MOVE IT, yeah yeah, I LIKE TO MOVE IT! Move it move it move it!" (fluffy) poor guys doesn't realize the song is over… lol

* * *

Now how do u like that? Two great hits all in one chapter? I know it doesn't make up for the whole year and half that I didn't write. But it's not easy when ur loaded with work and college, 'specially art college. Those homework assignments cane take like 4-6 hours to do!

Hope u liked it, please review, thanks!

* * *


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